Six Years After
by EdwardzTopazEyez
Summary: AU. Six years after Edward left her Bella has become a teacher. Still trying to put her life back together, how will Bella cope when a new face enters her class? A face she thought she would never see again...
1. Tuesday Morning

**BPOV **

**Chapter**** One**

I laid in bed and stared at my ceiling. My alarm clock would be going off any minuet now.

It's been years. Six to be exact. And not a single day has gone by that I haven't thought of him. A single night that I haven't had nightmares of chasing him in that moss covered forest. That I haven't wished he was here, or that I could just _once_ more look into his perfect topaz eyes. _Him. _Edward. My Edward. My angel. Well, he _was_ mine. Just not anymore.

I wrapped my arm around my chest to hold myself together. It just hurt to much to think about him, even though I found myself doing just that all the time. I must be a masochist.

Maybe I'm just pathetic. I mean _six _years. Six! I should be over him by now, shouldn't I? But I'm not.

I tried to fall for Jake a few years after _he _left. I really, truly did. But it just felt _wrong. _Like betrayal, even though the only one I was betraying was _me. _It was my own heart that disagreed... Anyway, Jake, my best friend, 'wolf-boy-wonder,' as I call him sometimes, imprinted on Sarah three years ago. Their both so happy now.

It's been a while since I've felt happiness like that. A long while.

The beeping sound of my alarm clock tore me from my thoughts, and I sighed as I rolled over to shut it off.

I lived in Ithaca, New York now. I moved hear from Washington two years ago.

Forks, Seattle, all the moss covered tress, everything just held to many memories of Edward for me to stay there any longer. Besides, he was never coming back for me. I accepted that a long time ago, so why should it matter anyway where I was? Besides, if he wanted to find me it would be all to easy.

I made my way to the bathroom in my apartment to take a shower. To, '_Have a human moment,' _as Edward would say.

After I graduated from Forks High, I went to a University in Seattle to study literature. And now I was the 10th and 11th grade literature teacher at East Ithaca High.

Today was the first day of school, and would be my second year teaching here. To my immense surprise after I took the job, I loved it!

I let the heat of the water relax my muscles as I prepared for the first day of school. I still used my favorite strawberry shampoo, not because _he _loved it. Though he did. But because it was something I had always done, it was proof that some things can stay the same. It was something I did before I met Edward, and something I still did even though he was gone.

Getting out of my shower and dying myself off, I could smell the coffee brewing in my automatic coffee maker in the kitchen.

Getting dressed in a khaki skirt and light blue blouse, I looked myself over in the mirror and sighed when I realized I looked exactly the way I did the day I went to _his _house when I met his family.

I looked at my clock and knew I didn't have time to change clothes, so I bolted into the kitchen to pour my coffee in a cup with a lid, sort of like a thermos, and spilt some of it on my hand in the attempt.

"Crap." I muttered to my self at the burn, and began to run my hand under cold water from the faucet.

When I finally managed to cool my hand off (even though it still sort of hurt), pour my coffee, find my keys and shoes and get out the door, I knew I was going to be late.

I turned the keys in the ignition to start my truck. The same truck Charlie bought me all those years ago.

With the time I was making it looked like I would arrive at the school at about the same time the warning bell would ring.

I sighed. This was not going to be my day. Trying to distract myself from thoughts of being late and of _him, _I flipped my radio on. The same stereo that Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie had bought for me on that horrid birthday. The birthday that changed my life.

_I remember stormy weather,_

_The way the sky looks when it's cold,_

_and you were with me content with walking,_

_so unaware of the world._

_**(Song: "Tuesday Morning" by Michelle Branch)**_

I flipped the station quickly, the song reminding me too much of _him._

_I still think of you,_

_when the nights are cold,_

_when I'm all alone,_

_I still feel you here._

_I'm still learning how to live with the distance,_

_and my hearts resistance,_

_forever reminds me..._

_I can't let go of you,_

_letting go of me, _

_I can't let go of you,_

_letting me, letting me go,_

_I can't get over you,_

_every part of me,_

_can't let go of you,_

_letting me go..._

_**(Song: "Letting go of me" by Jessie Daniels)**_

I turned off the radio in my truck and tried not to let the tears building up in my eyes to escape and the hole in my chest to rip wide open.

I could see the school now. Taking deep calming breaths, I distracted my mind by thinking of today's lesson plan, and of my friend Maris who taught creative writing. I hadn't seen her in a few weeks, maybe she would go out to dinner with me tonight.

I parked my truck in the staff's section, grabbed my coffee out of the cup-holder and my school bag off the passenger seat, and made a mad dash for the front doors.

I heard the warning bell go off. _Phew, I was just on time. _

I let out a sigh of relief, and made my way to my 11th grade class.

I opened the classroom door to find that most the students were already here and talking in low voices, their were only a few empty desks.

Making my way to the front of the class, I put my bag on my desk and set my coffee down. The second bell hadn't rang yet so all of the kids were still catching up with each other after a whole summer apart. I didn't interrupt, instead I just sat down and breathed another sigh of relief that I had finally made it and wasn't late.

"How was your summer, Miss Swan?" A seventeen year old named Brian Mason asked, I had had him in my 10th grade class last year. He was one of my best students.

"It was kind of boring actually, Mr Mason." I answered him, "I'm glad to be back here." He smiled at me. I wasn't sure of course, but I was kind of under the impression that he had a crush on me.

A girl walked in then, and I recognized her as Jessica Frasier, she had been in my class last year as well. She was a sweet bubbly girl. She had shoulder length dark brown hair, and was always very excited and energetic. She reminded me of Alice, always.

"Oh, Miss Swan!" She exclaimed upon entering the class, "I hadn't realized you were teaching the 11th grade class as well! How was your summer?"

I smiled at her, I just couldn't help but like Jessica Frasier. "It was a bit slow, Jessica. I'm glad to be back here with you guys."

She smiled and took her seat.

The bell rang then, and most of the students stopped talking and turned to face me. A few though ignored the bell and continued on with their conversations.

"Alright." I called as I stood up from my chair and turned the face the chalkboard where I wrote my name.

I turned back to face my students. "I realize you have all been away from each other all summer, but you have the whole school year to catch up. Now is really not the time." I try to be nice to the students, they respect and like you more if you do. You just have to be patient after all.

"We have a few new students in this class I see," I said looking down at a paper that Judy, the school secretary had sent me last week. "Would Sara White, Katie Hester and Jonathan Thomas raise their hands please?"

I saw pale skinned blond girl raise her hand, she looked shy. "Are you Miss White?" I asked her.

"Yes, Ma'am." She said.

A tan girl with blue eyes and brown hair said her name was Katie Hester, and a tall gangly looking guy introduced himself as Jonathan Thomas.

"Welcome to the class." I said kindly to them.

"Now," I said to the class, "This semester we'll be covering some of my favorite classics such as _Pride and Prejudice, Romeo and Juliet, Wuthering Heights a_nd_ Jane Eyre _to name a few.

"Can anybody tell me who wrote _Pride and Prejudice_?" I asked the class. Nearly every hand shot up.

"That's what I thought." I said with a laugh. "How many of you have read the book?" I asked them. Most of the guys and a little more that half the girls who had their hands in the air put them down on their desk.

I smiled at them. "How many of you read the book _before _you saw the movie?" I asked them.

Only three of my students hands were still in the air. One boy and two girls.

I recognized one of them as the new girl, Sara White.

"Miss White," I said kindly. "What do you like best about 'Pride and Prejudice?'"

"Well...I suppose I really like how both Mr Darcy and Elizabeth have to over come their pride to admit that they love each other."

Their was a knock on the door just then and Jeff Hart entered, he was on the school staff.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, Miss Swan." He said kindly, "but we have another new student. He and his family just moved into town two days ago, and enrolled their kids here today." He pushed the door open a little wider and in walked the most gorgeous boy I had ever seen.

His bronze hair was ruffled and his topaz eyes shined. He was pale white and graceful. It was the face of an angel. A face I never thought I would see again.

I heard the collective intake of breath as the female students in my class saw him and realized they had never before seen anyone and never would see anyone more beautiful then _him. _

When he entered his eyes snapped up to mine, and widened in shock.

I dropped my coffee cup and heard it clatter on the floor. Thank goodness it didn't break.

It was as if time stopped. I was getting dizzy and realized after a few moments it was because I wasn't breathing.

I took a deep breath, filling my lungs with much needed oxygen. He saw that and smiled my favorite crooked smile.

My heart began to beat triple time, and his grin widened even further. "Stupid vampire hearing," I muttered under my breath so only he could hear.

I heard him chuckle at that.

"Everybody," Jeff Hart said, "This is Edward Cullen."

A girl in the back row fainted. Only _his _beauty could do that.


	2. Wuthering Heights

Disclaimer - I don't own Twilight or anything related. Only the plot came from my mind, and without Steph Meyer I wouldn't even have it.

**Chapter Two.**

**BPOV**

Jeff Hart exited the room to get back to the front office where he would undoubtedly flirt with Judy until his next class.

"I...uhh...I." I stuttered patheticly. I shut my mouth and took a deep breath through my nose to calm myself.

"Welcome to the class Mr Cullen." I finally managed to say.

"Here," Edward said, grabbing a roll of paper towels off a near-by shelf, "Let me help you with that."

He was by my side in almost an instant and cleaning up my coffee off of the floor.

I looked back up at the class and remembered Jodi had fainted. "Could somebody please escort Jodi to the nurses office?" I asked them.

A boy near the back got up and went to attend to Jodi, who was just now coming to. He helped her to stand and then they left the room.

By the time I looked back at Edward, he had already cleaned up the coffee and thrown away the paper towels. He was just standing their in the middle of the classroom staring at me with the most intense gaze that I had to remind myself to breathe.

I closed my eyes much like I once had in bioligy when we were in high school together, I just couldn't think properly when looking at him. And he knew it.

"Thank you for taking care of that, Mr Cullen. " I said quietly to him, "Please take a seat."

I took a deep breath and opened my eyes, looking everywhere but at him.

"Alright class," I called, "Where were we, before our interruption?" I sounded calm at least.

"Oh, yes." I quickly answered myself, "The classics we will be studying this semester." I saw Edward smile at this out of the conner of my eye. He knew my love for the classics.

"Who can tell me something about Wuthering Heights, who did _not _see the movie starring Ralph Fiennes...Or any other version for that matter." A few students chuckled at that.

Edward raised his hand. I sighed and looked over at him reluctantly.

"Yes, Mr Cullen, can you tell me what this story is about?" I said.

"Yes, Ma'am." He flashed my favorite crooked smile, and said, "It's a tale about Cathrine and Heathcliff, and their love for each other. Their both very stubborn anf proud. In the end, even though she loves Heathcliff more than she loves even herself, she decides to marry Edgar Linton for the money. She knew that should she marry Heathcliff, even though she loved him, they woud both be homeless and penniless, but if she married Edgar she could help Heathcliff financially." He stared directly into my eyes and said slowly as my heart beat heavily in my chest. "She thought it would be better for Heathcliff if she married Edgar, that's why even though she loved him, she left him. _She wanted to protect him_...'He's always, always in my mind,'" He quoted now, "'Not as a pleasure, any more than I am always a pleasure to myself, but as my own being...'"

I got the feeling towards the end, that he wasn't talking about Cathrine and Heathcliff.

"Umm...Thank you, Mr Cullen." I said unsteadily.

The rest of class passed in a blur, mostly I just gave them a lecture about 1800s classics and we talked about the differences between Charlotte and her sister Emily Bronte, who both wrote timeless and enchanting story's.

"Your homework is to read the first chapter of Pride and Prejudice..." The bell rang just then and the class started to disperse. "Mr Cullen, please remain behind." I called over the buzz of students now leaving my classroom.

All too soon (or maybe it wasn't soon enough), the class was empty save two.

"Edward." I whispered, but I don't think my voice made any sound.

My hand came up to mouth as I tried to stifle my sobs.

"Oh, Bella." He was at my side in an instant. "Shh...Don't cry, Bella. Oh, please don't cry." He had me in the cold embrace of his arms now. I had forgotten just how wonderful it felt to be held by him. How cold he was, how good he smelled, how hard his skin was. I had forgotten just how perfect it felt to be in his arms.

"Oh, Bella. I'm so sorry. So very sorry.

**EPOV**

Alice had been blocking her thoughts from me for the past two weeks, and it was beginning to drive me insane. She had spent forty-eight hours of that singing the song that never ends in Latin. It was pure and utter torture. End of story.

We just moved to Ithica again. We had been here before about sixty years ago. Jasper and Alice hadn't been with us then, though.

We were starting High School today. It would be the first time I had so much as set foot in a school since I left Bella. In fact, the whole family practically had to beg just to get me to agree to this.

I was in my room, sulking. I did that a lot now. I was depressed. I drove Jasper crazy, but I just couldn't help it.

_She's always, always on my mind. Not as a pleasure, anymore than I am always a pleasure to myself. But as my own being._

Emily Bronte's words from Wuthering Heights rang true in my head. Only I changed the 'he' to a 'she.'

I missed Bella like crazy. I always found myself wondering if I had done the right thing by leaving her. Was she happy? Maybe she was married...ugh...that would be awful and totally fair at the same time. After all, I am the one that left so that she clould lead a normal human life.

I want her to be happy. But I can't stand the thought of her being happy with anybody else.

Ugh! I'm such a selfish hypocrite.

_Edward, it's time to go. _I heard Alice's "voice" in my head. And then she went back to converting the 'Battle Hymn of the Republic' into Arabic.

What was she keeping from me?? It was maddening!

I sighed and got up off of the couch I had been lying on in my room.

Esme kissed my cheek on my way out. _Oh, I hope he'll be okay. _She thought.

All to soon we had arrived at the school. Jasper and Alice and I in the my Volvo and Emmett and Rosalie in her red BMW.

We got oot of our cars and made out way to the front entrance.

_He looks awful. _He _left _her, _he needs to suck it up and get over it. She was just some human anyway. _Rosalie's always spiteful thoughts had me grinding my teeth in frustration.

This was going to be a very, very long day. I could already tell.


	3. Through Edward's Eyes

Review and tell me what you think!!

* * *

**EPOV**

As we entered the school, I could already feel a boring schedule in the making. High-School, just like before I met Bella, would be my own personal purgatory. There was nothing that a teacher could tell me, that I didn't already know. Half the time they didn't even know what they were talking about, they just said what the books told them to.

As Alice, Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie and I reached the administrative office, I again found myself wondering what Alice was keeping from me. At the moment she was reciting the Latin alphabet backwards. It had been a long time since she went through such tedious measures to keep her thoughts hidden from me.

A woman named Judy handed us our schedules and then led Emmett and Jasper to their first class. American History. It was Jasper's favorite class no matter what school we went to, I never quite understood his enthusiasm for it, after all there was nothing the teacher could tell him that he didn't already know. Maybe it was the same as my love for music class, always my favorite subject no matter the school. At least it used to be, I doubted very seriously if I would love to play piano now, I hadn't even played since I left Bella. Except once or twice to play her lullaby to myself, but that always left me falling to pieces.

A kind woman named Maris asked Alice to follow her to her first class, Home Economics. I almost laughed out loud at the idea of Alice learning how to cook. She must have been really busy blocking her thoughts from me if she didn't see that one coming.

Soon after a man with extremely dirty thoughts about Rosalie told her to follow him to the Gym, PE was her first class.

And then I was alone, left to my thoughts. I looked down at my schedule to see what my first class would be. 11th Grade English/British Literature. Well, at least that didn't sound too awful. My teachers name was a Mr. Swan. My silent cold heart clenched as I read the name. _Swan. _How I missed her. I longed to see her. To hold her in my arms. To tell her I was a liar, that I hadn't meant it. That I was in love with her.

I broke off from my thoughts when a man named Jeff Hart told me he would show me the way to my class. He was nervous about something for some reason. Something about a girl. It was extremely boring and tedious to listen to, so I tuned him out.

Finally we reached the classroom. The sign next to the door however didn't read, _Mr I. Swan, _as I had expected, but, _Miss B Swan. _The paper had been incorrect it seemed.

I barely dared to hope that she could be in here. But even as I was thinking, Jeff Hart opened the classroom door, and the air stirred around me. Bringing with it a scent I thought I would only ever smell again in my memories.

If it was possible for me to have a heart-attack, I'm sure I would have died of one that moment.

I didn't even hear what the man was saying. Who cared what he was saying anyway? I stepped into the room, and was met with the most beautiful astounded eyes I could ever imagine. Bella's chocolate-brown pools stared intently into my currently golden ones.

Her cheeks flushed red when her metal coffee cup clattered onto the floor.

It was almost as if time had stopped in that one single moment. I could tell she wasn't breathing, it was nice to know I could still dazzle her. Even after all this time. Not that I wasn't equally as dazzled.

She was biting down on her bottom lip and her eye-bows were fixed into a look of shock. Not only was she not breathing, but she wasn't moving.

Finally after a few moments she took a deep breath, and flushed crimson when she realized she hadn't been breathing.

I smiled at her. Her favorite crooked smile. I couldn't help it, she was just too beautiful.

Her heart-beat kicked up a couple notches, the sound of her pounding heart pumping her beautiful blood throughout her veins was perfectly clear to me. Her blood was almost no temptation at all. Not now that I knew what it was like to be without her.

I smiled wider.

"Stupid vampire hearing." I heard her mutter under her breath.

I smiled at that, and apparently Bella wasn't the only one to see it. Or the only one to be dazzled by me.

The thoughts of the girls around me were overwhelmingly annoying.

A girl named Jodi, in the back row had forgotten to breathe. She fainted, and slipped to the floor.

Jeff Hart exited the room, but I didn't move. And neither did Bella. We just stood there, staring at each other.

"I...Uh...I..." Bella stuttered incoherently, my heart went out to her. She was struggling for words in a moment of shock.

Was she pleased to see me? Did she hate me? Would she take me back if I asked her? My thoughts plagued me.

She took a deep calming breath, and then said, "Welcome to the class Mr Cullen."

"Here," I said, "let me help you with that."

I grabbed a roll of paper-towels and began cleaning up the coffee off of the floor.

She was determinedly looking away from me. It was maddening! What was she thinking? I simply had to know!

"Could somebody please escort Jodi to the nurses office?" I heard her say to the class. Even hearing all of those stupid children's thoughts, I had almost forgotten they were here.

A boy near the back of the class helped Jodi to stand and then led her out of the room.

By this time I had already cleaned up the coffee and threw the used paper-towels into the waste-bin in the corner.

Finally, Bella turned to face me, but her eyes were shut, "Thank you for taking care of that, Mr Cullen. " She whispered to me, "Please take a seat."

I did as she asked me, and sat in one of four empty desks. Two of which would be occupied by the fainting girl and the guy who helped her to the nurse's office when they returned.

I sat in the only empty seat in the front row.

I tried to block the thoughts of the girl who was sitting directly behind me. She annoyingly reminded me of Jessica Stanley.

"Alright class," I heard Bella say from the front of the room, her heart still beating twice the normal pace, and facing anywhere but at me, "Where were we, before our interruption?"

I heard several peoples thoughts, _'I love Pride & Prejudice.' _I heard one girl think to herself, _'We were talking about the classics.' _I heard somebody else think.

I smiled to myself. Bella always did love the classics.

"Oh, yes." She said to herself, "The classics we will be studying this semester. Who can tell me something about Wuthering Heights, who did _not _see the movie starring Ralph Fiennes...Or any other version for that matter." A few of the students laughed at this, a boy named Brian Masen though, laughed the most. I could tell from his thoughts that he fancied himself in love with her.

She still wasn't looking anywhere near me. So I raised my hand.

She sighed and turned to look at me. "Yes, Mr Cullen, can you tell me what this story is about?" She asked me.

"Yes, Ma'am." I said with a smile, her heart skipped a beat. "It's a tale about Cathrine and Heathcliff, and their love for each other. Their both very stubborn and proud. In the end, even though she loves Heathcliff more than she loves even herself, she decides to marry Edgar Linton for the money. She knew that should she marry Heathcliff, even though she loved him, they would both be homeless and penniless, but if she married Edgar she could help Heathcliff financially." I looked directly into her beautiful chocolate brown eyes, and tried to will her into understating what I was trying to tell her.

"She thought it would be _better_ for Heathcliff if she married Edgar, that's why even though she loved him, she left him. _She wanted to protect him_...'He's always, _always_ in my mind,'" I quoted near the end, "'Not as a pleasure, any more than I am always a pleasure to myself, but as my own being...'"

Her heart was beating even faster than before, and her face was a little flush. She had never looked more beautiful.

"Umm...Thank you, Mr Cullen." She said unsteadily.

She went back to ignoring my face, looking everywhere but at me. I couldn't tell if it was because she didn't _want _to look at me, or just because she became incoherent every time she did.

I soaked in her every word. Never moving my eyes from her. Her face, her arms, her legs, her beautiful eyes. She was beautiful but more thin and much paler than she ever was before.

I took many deep breaths, letting her scent saturate every part of me.

Before I knew it the hour was up, and the bell was ringing.

"Your homework is to read the first chapter of Pride and Prejudice..." She called to the class who was currently dispersing around me. I wasn't going to move though. I was going to sit right here until everyone else left, and I was going to talk to her...

"Mr Cullen, please remain behind." I heard her say over the buzz of the other students.

And then we were alone. She was sitting in the chair behind her desk just looking at me intently, as though she thought I was going to vanish in a puff of smoke.

"Edward." I heard her whisper my name, almost too quietly for even _me _to hear. And then she was sobbing. Her hand came up to her mouth to try and stifle them, but they were still there. My heart broke for her.

"Oh, Bella." I whispered before I rushed to her side and pulled her into the circle of my arms, cradling her. "Shh...Don't cry, Bella. Oh, please don't cry." I whispered into her ear.

It was amazing, even better than my crystal-clear memory, to have her here in my arms. Her warmth, her smell, the feel of her heart beating through her shirt and on my chest. It was perfect.

How could I have left her? How had I found the strength? If she would take me back, I would never leave her again. No matter what.

"Oh, Bella. I'm so sorry. So very sorry."


	4. Begging you to Dazzle me

BPOV

I could have remained in his perfect embrace forever. I _wanted _to, even.

But I knew, in my heart, that it couldn't last.

That their was nothing I could do to _make _it last.

I was sobbing into his rock-hard, freezing-cold chest. His velvet voice was exactly the same as I remembered it, and he was currently whispering in my ear with it.

"Please don't cry, Bella," The angel's voice whispered in my ear. "I can't take it."

The perfectness of his voice. The smell coming off of him - better than I remembered. His perfectly beautiful topaz eyes. The way that, even though I _knew _he didn't age - _couldn't _age - that he was exactly the same as before, just as perfect. It broke my heart.

Because even though I loved him, I knew now that this perfectly beautiful, sweet and heartbreakingly romantic boy - no _man - _wasn't meant for me.

He probably felt bad for causing me pain.

Of course he did.

He knew how much I loved him, and he was sorry he caused me pain. He was sorry he came back. Sorry to see me.

He wished he had never come here.

How could he not?

With as much will as I could muster (i.e. Not a lot), I broke from his embarce and took one shake step backwards. Away from him.

My heart broke more.

My eyes were still wet, but the tears had stopped coming. How I managed that, though, I doubt I'll ever know.

"Bella?" Edward's low voice spoke to me.

"Edward..." I whispered, "Why?...Why did you come he-" My voice broke, and I hysterically tried to choke back a sob that was fighting it's way to the surface. My throat clenched around it, holding it at bay. But Edward knew.

Of course he knew.

It occurred to me then, like a bolt of lightning. Just like all those years ago, when I was trying to decide what to do with the motorcycles. The answer came to me, with a flash of intution - I _knew._

He didn't know I was going to be here. He was just as shocked to see me as I was to see him.

Alice knew though. Of that I hadn't a single doubt.

She knew, and she kept it from him.

He didn't want to be here. He came here, but he didn't know I would be here.

If he had of known, he wouldn't have come.

His hand reached out tentatively and he stroked the length of my cheek with the pad of his thumb. Wiping away that single remaining tear.

"Bella," He whispered, "You have to understand that I...I..." He struggled for words, a rare occurrence for him. It seemed to me that, if it were possible for him to cry, his eyes would be overflowing with tears.

Finally he whispered, "I'm so sorry, Bella. So unbelievably sorry...I..." He struggled again.

I wonderd what he was waiting for. He should just tell me that he doesn't want to see me agian, and get it over with.

He did it once. How hard, really, could it be to do it again?

"I owe you an apology." He finally said, "No, of course, I owe you much more than that." He took a deep breath, "I never wanted to hurt you, Bella. But it was the only way! I couldn't think of anything else to do! You just wouldn't stop...You were so...so...so _determined _to be one of us... Like you _wanted _me to take your soul...And I - "

I cut him off, "Stop!" I took a shaky breath and then continued, "Edward, I get it. You didn't _want _me. You _don't _want me. I know...Of course even then I _knew _that you didn't want me around _forever. _But I always hoped. Hoped I could change your -"

This time he cut me off. A cold finger pressed to my lips to silence me.

He looked angry. No he looked more that that.

"Bella," It was almost a growl. My body's natural instincts kicked in my flight-or-flight reflex, recognizing danger. But I stood my ground.

He wouldn't hurt me, of that I was sure.

"Is that what you think?" He didn't sound nearly as angry as before. He probably realized that he had scared me.

"Yes....?" I sounded unsure, my answer sounded like a question.

What did he mean, _is that what I think_? Isn't that what he had been trying to tell me? That he didn't love me? That he didn't want to be with me?

What was he talking about?

"Bella," His topaz eyes were shining. He wasn't angry anymore. I knew those eyes, I could still read them better than anybody elses.

But it didn't make any sense. He was looking at me like...like he loved me.

Maybe I couldn't read him as well as I thought.

He smiled a small crooked smile. The one that I loved, the one that made my heart beat double time without fail. And it didn't disappoint this time either.

And as my heart sped up, so did my breathing.

"I still love you, Bella." It was a whisper. Loving. Velvet, muted. His voice beautiful, never had his voice sounded so beautiful. Never had any voice sounded so good to anyone, anywhere, as his voice sounded to me.

A tear escaped my eye.

I couldn't help but hope.

I couldn't help but believe him

I still loved him, still loved him so much.

He reached his hand towards my face, I thought he was going to wipe the tear away. But instead he cupped my neck with his hand, and bent his face toward mine.

I thought he was going to kiss me.

And by- golly I would have let him.

His breath blew on my face.... Gosh, how good it smelled.

"Bella," He whispered, trying to dazzle me. And boy was it working. His topaz eyes bored into mine, like he could see my very soul. "I can't read your mind, Bella. You have to tell me what you're thinking."

I showed him what I was thinking instead.

His lips tasted even better than I remembered. And this kiss was perfect, intoxicating. He didn't hold back they way he used to, and you can bet I wasn't holding back either.


	5. I'm so sorry, Bella

**EPOV**

She was sobbing in my arms now.

I would have let her stay in my arms forever.

I would have changed her into a monster.

I would have given her everything I owned.

I would do anything she asked. I would do anything she wanted, so long as she didn't make me leave.

Did she hate me?

I couldn't bear not knowing what she was thinking.

Would she ever forgive me? Had I hurt her beyond repair?

Her salty tears were staining my shirt now, but I didn't care about the shirt.

All I cared about was her. She was everything. She _is _everything.

All that is important and beautiful in my world is she. The air I breathe and the heart that doesn't beat are her.

She is my every thought at every moment.

And she was crying.

Crying because of me.

"Please don't cry, Bella," I whispered in her ear, "I can't take it."

Bella was silent save for her relentless sobs. She clung to me fiercely, as though I were her lifeline and she feared that the line was about to be cut.

With shock and horror I realized that that was entirely plausible. Had I not made her many promises? Had I not broke every one? I left her once already. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. But I did it.

If she still loves me, she must think I'm about to leave again.

She must think me a monster now. Not the type I always said I was. But the other kind. The kind of monster that hurt people.

She pulled in a deep steadying breath and took a shakey step backwards. Away from me.

"Bella?" I whispered, imploring her to say something. Anything. As long as I could her her voice.

The clock ticked in the background. Moments that felt like an eternity - to me anyway - passed before she spoke.

"Edward..." Her voice broke on my name. "Why?" She asked me, still sobbing, "Why did you come he-" Her voice broke again as she tried to stifle her sobs.

But I knew what she was trying to say, _'Why did you come here.' _

She hated me.

Of course she did.

How could she not.

I sighed internally.

How could I tell her that I didn't even _know _that she was going to be here. If I told her that, she would take it to mean that I didn't _want _to be here.

This was going to be hard.

She probably didn't want to hear it anyway.

She was still sobbing in my arms, but her tears had stopped coming.

I knew she was slowly trying to compose herself.

I struggled to find the words to say. The _right _words.

The words that would make this right.

They evaded me though. They failed to come.

I was never so lost for words as I was when I was with her.

I reached my hand out towards her face and stroked one of her stray tears away as softly as I could. She was so warm. And still so beautiful, even through her tears.

Finally I spoke, "Bella, you have to understand that I...I..." I struggled for words again.

"I'm sorry, Bella. So unbelievably sorry...I..." Even though I knew it was impossible, I felt like I was about to cry.

I knew that if it _was _possible I would probably be crying more than the angel in my arms.

"I owe you an apology... No, of course, I owe you much more than that." I took a deep steadying breath, hoping against hope that this would come out right. "I never wanted to hurt you, Bella. But it was the only way! I couldn't think of anything else to do! You just wouldn't stop..."

This was definatly not coming out right. "You were so...so...so _determined_ to be one of us... Like you _wanted _me to take your soul...And I - "

She cut me off then, "Stop!" It was almost a yell.

And I did.

I would do anything she asked me.

"Edward, I get it. You didn't _want_ me. You _don't _want me. I know...Of course even then I _knew_ that you didn't want me around _forever_. But I always hoped. Hoped I could change your -" This time _I c_ut _her _off. My finger on her lips to silence her.

And I was angry.

Not with her of course. Never with her.

I was furious with me.

_"Bella," _Her name came out angrier than I meant, and I could tell that it scared her. Her eyes widening in fear.

"Is that what you think?" I asked her as gently as I could.

"Yes....?" Her answer sounded like a question, and it almost made me laugh. Almost, but not quite. Because at that moment my heart was breaking for her broken heart.

I hurt her so much.

"Bella," I whispered her name with revrence and smiled.

I knew how much she loved my smile.

Her heart beat picked up.

"I still love you, Bella."

I was holding my breath. Hoping with every part of me that she would believe me. That she would take me back.

A tear slipped down her cheek, and I wondered if I had only upset her more.

_Say something, Bella. _Her silence was tormenting me. _Please... What are you thinking?_

I reached my hand towards her face. I was going to wipe that single tear away, but I changed my mind at the last second.

Instead I put my hand on the back of her neck. I could feel her blood pulsing faster and faster through my hand, her sweet scent saturated every part of me.

But surprisingly, it was no temptation at all.

My breath blew into her face as I whispered - trying to dazzle her into speaking her mind of course, "Bella," my eyes bore into her deep beautiful chocolate brown pools. "I can't read your mind, Bella." As she well knew. "You have to tell me what you're thinking."

And then, faster than I would have believed possible for a human, she was kissing me.

Her breath came in a wild gasp as our lips connected. One of her hands came up to tangle itself in my hair and the other went up to rest on my cheek.

And I was kissing her back.

It was even better than my perfect memories - kissing her.

Her lips were extremely warm against my cold ones. Her breath was intoxicating, like a drug that I couldn't get enough of.

I suppose this meant that she was going to take me back.

I felt like laughing through the kiss. I hadn't been this happy in so long.

I settled for smiling through it instead.

We finally broke apart, so that Bella could breathe. But even as she stood there in my arms, breath shallow, I kissed her. I kissed her cheeks and her nose and her closed eyes. I kissed away her remaining tears.

_Where is she? _

Jeff Hart's 'voice' brought me back to reality as I realized that I was in the middle of a classroom - as a 17 year old student - kissing my twenty-four year old teacher.

It wouldn't have bothered me much, kissing Bella in the middle of the classroom, if I hadn't realized from Jeff Hart's voice that he was heading here. To speak to Bella.

I kissed her once more on the lips, and then took two steps backwards, away from her.

Her eyes widened, and she looked hurt. "Edward?" It was a whisper, "what-"

"Shh..." I murmured, "It's okay, Bella." I tried to reassure her, "Someone's coming."

"Oh." Was her only reply.

She wiped at her face to make sure all her tears were gone.

She was just patting at her hair to make sure it was straight when there was a rap on the door.

She threw me a quick grin as the door opened.

"Bella?" Jeff Hart said as he stepped into the classroom.

Bella rolled her eyes at me. "Yes, Mr Hart?" Came her reply.

_Why won't she just call me Jeff, already? _His thoughts invaded my head. _And what is she doing in here with that new student?_

"I was just wondering where you were." He flashed her a grin that was obviously meant to 'dazzle' her. It wasn't working.

I almost laughed when I heard her teeth grind together.

"I'm sorry, Mr Hart. I was just going over some of the finer points of eighteenth century literature with Mr. Cullen here." Her voice was incrediby smooth for someone so angry. Although I could tell from his thoughts that he hadn't picked up on her anger yet.

"Was there something you needed?" She finally got to the point.

_I wish that student would leave. _He practically screamed his thoughts at me. _I can't ask her out with some student standing here._

"Well..." his voice trailed off as the warning bell for the next class rang. "Perhaps you should be getting to your next class, Mr Cullen." Jeff Hart threw at me.

I fixed my face with a look of shock, "I don't know the way, Mr Hart. The woman at the front desk didn't give me a map.... And you led me here."

"Oh," he said.

"Maybe Mr. Hart could escort you to your next class, Mr Cullen." Bella suggested, and I could tell from her face that any excuse not to talk to him would be a good one.

She looked very pointedly at me, "We'll finish this discussion..._later, _Mr Cullen."

"Perhaps you should make sure Edward here isn't late for his next class, Mr Hart." She said, sitting down in the chair behind her desk. Waiting for her next students, I presumed.

Hart's thoughts were complainatory, but grudgingly he said, "Come on, Mr Cullen. What's your next class?"

I looked down at my schedule, not that I needed to, I had a perfect memory. "It's Spanish II, sir." I told him politely.

"All right, come on Mr Cullen." He said to me and then turned around to face Bella, "I'll see you later, Ms Swan. Perhaps dinner at seven?" He was overly hopeful that she would say yes.

I stared at her as she answered, as did Jeff Hart. "No thank you, Mr Hart, but I'm not interested." She said coolly, "As you know."

He smirked, "One day, Bella, you'll change your mind."

This child was getting on my nerves. He didn't even know her. Did this count as sexual harassment? I didn't think so, but that didn't mean I would hesitate to knock him into a wall.

I heard her teeth grind together, and saw the anger flash in her eyes. "I'm not going to change my mind, Jeff." She said each word slowly, her voice flat, "I wasn't interested yesterday or the week before. Or even when I first got here.... Besides," Her voice sounded almost off-hand now, "I'm seeing somebody." Her eyes flashed to my face for less than a second, as though daring me to say otherwise, before going back to glare at her pompous admirer.

"You never...told me you were seeing... somebody." He stuttered.

"You never asked." She said, still seething. Although it was much more noticeable to me than to Jeff Hart.

"Mr Cullen you should get to class." She said, finally looking at me.

"Thank you for speaking with me, Ms Swan." I called over my shoulder, as Jeff Hart led me out of Bella's classroom and towards Spanish II. She gave me a dazzling smile just before the door clicked shut behind me.

"It was my pleasure." I heard her mutter, "And Edward," she whispered when I was halfway to my next class, Jeff hart complaining about Bella's stupid boyfriend in his head, "Thanks for getting rid of him. He's been driving me crazy."

I smiled to myself just as I settled into the desk of my next class.

Listening to the thoughts of a girl currently in Bella's classroom, I knew I was going to like it at this school at lot more than I had origionaly thought.

And I was so happy, because Bella would take me back.

I no longer had to go through life without her.

We would have a lot of talking to do later.


	6. Three Weeks Previously

**Authors Note – Sorry for taking so long to update, but here it is, the next chapter.**

**I would also like to note, that personally, I have nothing against Canada.**

_________

**Alice POV**

_Three Weeks Ago_

Canada.

I sighed. Of all the places we had ever lived, I liked Canada the least.

Not that there was anything especially wrong with Canada. There were, admittedly, many beautiful sights. But, when you've been around as long as I have, you just want something else.

Ever since Jasper and I found Carslile and the rest of our family, we have only lived in a few places.

Alaska.

Forks, Washington.

Ithaca, New York.

And Canada.

Many, many places in Canada.

In 60 something years, sometimes, you get a little bored with your surroundings.

I knew, of course, that I wasn't being especially fair. Knew that, the reason I was hating Canada at this moment more than ever before, was because I had never particularly missed a place before.

Canada wasn't exactly a sight for sore eyes.

I missed Forks. I missed the tiny school. I actually _missed_ the fact that I _hated_ that you had to drive over an hour to get to Seattle, which was the only good place around to shop.

But mostly, I missed Bella, my best friend - more my sister than Rosalie would ever be. Rose only ever thought of herself - and occasionally Emmett. But mostly just herself.

I missed taking Bella shopping, though she hated it. I missed dressing her up. I missed her laugh. I missed watching Emmett do things just to embarrass her. I missed how she accepted us. How she loved us. How she loved Edward, too. More than she probably loved anything or anyone else in the world- including her own biological family, how she loved him.

And I missed Edward, too.

Even after we managed to convince him to come back to us, which took three years, all he ever does now is stay in his room.

He only ever leaves to hunt, and he always goes alone.

I miss the way Bella could make him happy, the way she made him laugh. He was never so happy as when she was near.

He misses her. Of course he does. He loves her more than his own life. I bet he loves her more than anybody's life.

But I miss her too.

I miss the way our family was when she was around. _Whole. _Our family, now, can only be whole with her a part of it.

Edward never leaves his room.

Jasper and I spent some time alone in Alaska, after it happened. He couldn't bear to be around the family, even though none of us blamed him. Not even Edward.

We came back a year after it happened.

Carslile works so much later now, rather than to be home in the midst of the constant gloom.

Esme tries so hard to act normal, but she's grieving for Edward. Her heart is breaking for him. Jasper told me.

Emmett misses Bella too, a lot. He used to love to tease her. He can't talk about her to Rosalie, though. Because she was the only one to ever really hate her.

I sighed, rubbing my temples. Of course, it's impossible for a vampire to get a headache, but I think between my seeing constant visions of the future and Edward hearing everyone's thoughts, that we both come pretty close to getting them.

I let my mind sink into the future, each vision blurring into the next.

Jasper will be back home from hunting in exactly four minuets and twenty-two seconds. I'll be there to greet him when he gets back, and we'll go on a long drive together.

Edward will be in his room until Thursday, when he'll try to sneak out to go hunting, only to be stopped by a severely annoyed Emmett wanting to talk.

Esme is dithering over weather or not to repaint the living room. But it looks like, in the end, she'll end up repainting her and Carslile's bedroom.

Internally I shuddered. You don't even want to know what Rosalie and Emmett will be doing in exactly ten minuets and eleven seconds.

After that my visions got less pointed and much, much more random.

An airplane crashing in turkey at an unknown date could possibly somehow ignite a war between China and Germany.

Tanya and her sisters up in Denali might ask if they can come for a visit. They are currently undecided. But it looks like Tanya's intentions toward Edward, if they do come, will be less that innocent. He'll refuse her of course.

A bellboy in California is about to get into a car accident when a drunk driver runs a red light.

The American's President Obama will burn his left hand when he accidentally spills his coffee. He'll be in a meeting with the joint-chiefs, though, at the time. How embarrassing.

A dejected looking Bella Swan is going to burn her dinner in exactly six minuets if she doesn't stop crying.

I am suddenly pulled out the future by the sound of a strangled sounding sob coming from the direction of Edward's room.

Bella had looked so broken in my vision. So sad. And of course Edward would have seen it all.

I sighed. That vision hurt me too. It hurts to see her looking like that.

_'I'm sorry about that, Edward.' _I thought, knowing he would hear.

"It's okay, Alice." I heard him whisper.

Just then I heard a car coming up the driveway and I knew Jasper was home.

I went down to the front porch to meet him, all the while trying to get the heart-wrenching vision of Bella out of my mind.

***


End file.
